Monday, March 30, 2009
Some times I just want to live in a small "one horse" town where everyone knows your name. Where jeans and flannel shirts are the norm for out and about wear. Where people drive pick ups with their dogs in the front seat. Where there is actually a mom & pop supermarket, bakery, shoe repair, and just one stop light. Where going to DQ is stepping out. Where weekends are filled not at the mall, running errands or cleaning house, but sitting on the front porch, fishing at the lake or just being, well, simple. Less stress. Less material things to worry about.
But then I watch the news and see a small town in North Dakota who are living that simple life, put sand bags around their home of 25 years to protect it from the rising and freezing waters of the Red River. These poor people, are farmers and small business owners. As they watch their homes get flooded, family artifacts, their furniture...get washed away, I realize that the lives of those I once thought were simple, just aren't so simple anymore.
That's just my random thought for the day. And I don't really know if I would be down for flannel shirts, but they at least sound comfortable.
Monday, March 23, 2009
We celebrated my b-day with the rest of my family on Saturday night at my parents house. My mom made me some fried chicken with mashed potatoes, gravy, soft rolls and shrimp-mandarin salad. The meal was topped off with my requested dessert of carrot cake. My mom got me this super cute long cardigan from J-Crew. LOVE IT. She also got me some other clothes which I so need right now.
It was a good time to be had and I can't believe another year has gone by so quickly.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Because my parents were huge savers and coupon clippers and very conservative with their money while also putting two kids through college without loans, I have taken those traits with me into adulthood. But I don't think I am as good as a penny pincher as they are. In a sense I am, I only buy things that are on sale, buy store brands (in the supermarket) if the name brand is not on sale and search out the best deal on the Internet for something before I purchase. Rarely do I just buy something without putting some thought into it. I feel the items I just randomly purchase usually are the ones that are not used and just a waste of money.
So due to the rocky economy and my cheap ass inherited traits, I am going to try and have a Tuesday focus blog called "Tight Wad Tuesday". Each week I will focus on something that has great value at a low price. This week is just an intro and next week I will pick an item. I know, super original, but it gives me a chance to get out of my writing rut.
Being home for 5 months I have discovered the hidden treasures in stores like Ross, TJ Maxx and Marshall's. I have them ranked by which ones have better housewares (Ross), better baby clothes (Ross and TJ Maxx) and better designer clothing brands (Marshall's, hello I saw a pair of Hudson jeans there for 75% off!) I have also fallen in love with our outlet mall. I usually did not frequent it much but that has changed. I love the Carter's, Gymboree and Oshkosh stores and have found amazing deals at the GAP and Banana Republic stores too. As you mama's know, babies go through so many clothes so I am always looking for cute outfits for Sonya.
So with that I am closing my first Tight Wad Tuesday that consisted of meaningless chatter about being cheap and finding jeans at Marshall's.
Over and out.
Monday, March 16, 2009
Personally, I would feel kind of bad if a baby only cried at me when I came around. Lisa did not mind since our niece did that at her age. I secretly am flattered that I am the one she clings to even though I know she should get used to others.
I have a hard time when people are holding Sonya and being super high strung. In particular, hubbs' mom and grandparents are very much, how do I say this... "in your face" when it comes to playing with her. My theory is to have her discover things. Their theory is to shake things in front of her face (is normally okay to do if you are doing it gently, but they are obnoxious about it) and then they wonder why she gets frustrated. If she cries they chalk it up to her having a belly ache. I want to yell "she does not have a f*&^%*$^ belly ache, she doesn't like what you are doing!" She is a mellow baby and is not a fan of 15 modes of stimulation all at the same time. How do I voice these things to them politely? It really gets on my nerves. They are VERY loving people but are SOOOOO sensitive and I don't want to hurt their feelings at all, but in another sense, she is my daughter and they should respect my wishes whether they agree with me or not.
If my own parents are doing something I don't like, I quickly let them know, they may grumble a bit but I know they will listen and stop something that I don't like. I don't have a great relationship with my dad, he pisses me off a ton, but I actually am quite comfortable when he is with Sonya for some reason. I guess there are just people who are more natural around babies than others.
I guess I just had no idea how fired up I could get about the way people handle themselves around my daughter. I know part of it is just being a mom and feeling strongly protective, but the other part is the people who act weird around her are completely clueless. I want to know how to navigate around these dicey situations. I want people to respect me and hubb's wishes without getting all bent out of shape. Any words of wisdom?
Thursday, March 12, 2009
I was sad after I dropped Sonya off at daycare but my day has been very busy so I have not had a hard time focusing on other things. Plus, my boss and coworkers sent me a gorgeous bouquet of flowers to welcome me back.
Tomorrow I will work from home so this week was pretty easy in terms of a back to work transition.
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Sonya's 4 month appt. was today. She was 15 lbs. 4 oz. and is 25 inches long. Got the okay to start her on rice cereal, but I think I will wait until I get my new work schedule down before I try it. Also, I need to get a high chair. I am looking at the Peg Perego Prima Pappa one. It is more expensive but my cousin has one and it has lasted through three kids and still looks good. Does anyone have any recommendations? I want one that does not stand out too much in our dining room, can be easily cleaned and moved.
Off to put down the little munchkin for a nap. She is a bit tired from her shots. By the way, this time she barely cried. Hubb's sent me down the hall while she got them so I wouldn't cry like last time. I was a babbling mess at her 2 month check up.
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
So since I am going back to work soon (boo) I decided I needed to incorporate a fitness routine with my new work and baby routine. I remember Jen saying how much Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred worked, so I went ahead and ordered it. I hate going to the gym. I would much rather do things at home. But I don't like working out for long periods of time or else I get bored and lose interest, or maybe it is just me getting too exhausted. Anyhoo, I need something 30 minutes or less which is why I picked this one. Also, I can't find my 20 minute Winsor Pilates DVD. I think I lost it when we moved and am hoping to rediscover it one of these days, like when I decide to go through all of my old Donald Duck trinkets I collected when I was 12, or 18....or 26. I am super bummed I lost it, it really is the best work out ever. It helped me get super toned before we got married.
Either way, we'll see how that 30 Day Shred goes, thinking about starting it on Friday.... we'll see.
Sonya is rolling all over the place now. No longer can she be content on her back on the activity mat, she is now rolling over and over and over! It is so cute.
"Hey Mom, don't turn away, I am about to roll across the house quicker than you can make your microwave oatmeal!"
Monday, March 2, 2009
I'm going back to work in 9 days. How did 5 months go by so quickly? Where did the time go? I have appreciated every second of every day that I have been with our child. I am lucky, a lot of companies have shorter maternity leaves, but it still just does not seem like long enough.
Staying home is not an option. Living in Northern California is EXPENSIVE , even during this crappy economy, thus requiring two incomes to have a decent lifestyle. You don't know how many times I think about moving to somewhere else where it is cheaper to live where I can stay at home. But then you give up being close to family, friends and the place you called home. Both of our families live here. I want my daughter to know her grandparents and not just see them at major holidays. I think about this A LOT. A lot more than I tell hubbs. I know I would be so alone living so far away. My mom is my best friend, I see her about every couple of days, I can't imagine being a 5 hour plane ride away instead of a 10 minute drive.
I hope that once I get back to work, I start feeling better. I think everything will work out in my head. I will be working from home two days a week so Sonya will only be in daycare three days a week, but I just can't shake the guilt that I know is so common to moms going back to work. I know once I am back in the office interacting with my fellow colleagues, who also have kids in daycare, that my spirits will lift, but until then I am blue. I keep trying to soak it all in. I don't want to share Sonya with anyone. I want her all to myself. Seriously, look at this face, how could to you not?
We went to dinner last week with hubbs' grandparents who try to see Sonya as much as possible. While hubbs' grandma sat holding Sonya, I just wanted to reach across the table and grab her from her. I didn't want to share her! I feel bad for being like this, but in a sense, I feel like I have the right to be like this. I am going back to work soon, and I don't want to share. I'm the mom. Period.
The other day I asked my mom (who is a teacher) if she thought that kids that had a stay at home mom had different relationships with their moms than those whose mom's worked while they were little. She simply said "no". We then talked about the two of us and how my mom worked when I was a baby and how she is my best friend now. I did not feel abandoned when I was little because my mom worked. In fact, I actually looked up to her. Even at a young age, I realized the amount of items she could tackle in one day. I admired all that she could do; make use healthy lunches, get us to school on time, get herself to work on time, pick us up from daycare, fix a fabulous dinner (she IS the best cook I know), help us with our homework and still have time to give us undivided attention whenever we needed it. But most of all, we were so loved. I always was taken care of and nurtured without being spoiled. I hope that my daughter can look up to me like the way I look up to my mom.
Each day back at work will get a little easier, but I know there will still be those days that I picture me, hubbs', Sonya, Lucy and Patty all packed up in a U-Haul headed for some place more affordable, where I can stay at home, and be with my Sonya every morning, day and night.