Meet Antonio

Antonio is tan and built, like my hubbs, he is Italian. Dark and snuggly. He's a bit bigger than I usually prefer, borderline "taking 'roids" big. He is spoonable but not much more than that. He prefers laying on my left side and if he tries to get on my right side, he will likely wake up the hubbs. due to the ruckus it causes in the bed.

Meet Antonio.....

Hubbs purchased him for me this past weekend (when I was feeling blue) at Wal Mart. Hubbs has been concerned that I lay on my back too much (which I do) so went searching for a maternity pillow and ended up with this. He is way too puffy, so hopefully he will flatten out a bit. However, he is great to spoon. We have a queen size bed so things are starting to get a bit cramped. Throw a cat on the bed and mix in a dog sometimes and you have one tight package.

On to more exciting things... here are some pregnancy shots at 17 weeks. Looking quite lovely, that is fo sho. Hoping this awkward "in between phase" will hurry its ass along so I can start looking pregnant, dammit.

Still wearing pre-pregancy pants with the belly band every day, although I did buy one pair of maternity jeans (super fricking cute) and have an order of stuff on it's way. Waiting for the belly to just it get it's bulge on. Let me have it, I am ready for the belly, nice and big.

Hollowness

With my recent tragedy, how are you able to bounce back? I feel like it is so hard to have feelings. I just feel so hollow, like the magnitude of this is so big, that I literally can not digest everything and in turn, just sit around like a bump on a log. I think I literally am in shock mode. The only way I have been able to get my mind off of it, is by cooking and baking. I am obsessed with scouring cookbooks and want to make desserts. I don't even eat many desserts. It must be some sort of way that I keep myself distracted. Some sort of coping method. I went to work today to help get my mind off things, but have not been able to concentrate much.

After all of the news, I remembered that I go in for "THE" ultrasound on June 4th. This ultrasound will not only tell me the important stuff, that everything is developing normally, but also what the sex is! Whoo Hoo! Can't wait to find that out. I have to keep reminding myself that the baby will look/is healthy and there will be nothing to worry about. It is pretty crazy how much we are able to find out nowadays. When my mom was pregnant with my brother and me, she did not get any ultrasounds or any blood tests and her eating restrictions were much less limited. Now with all of these damn tests, I feel like pregnant women nowadays have so much more to worry about. Did you worry about any of the serious things? Or did you say "screw it" everything is fine?

My sister in law is two weeks ahead of me. She is supposed to find out the baby's sex on Thursday. I can not wait. They already have a girl, so we will see what is in store for them!

Upcoming post....belly shots and my new bed mate.

Tragedy

On Friday afternoon I found out my aunt, uncle (my mom's brother), cousin's husband and other cousin's long time girlfriend were killed in a plane crash. My aunt and uncle were on their way to their vacation home for the long holiday and had brought my two cousin's spouses with them. My uncle's plane had some sort of mechanical failure.

This has been the longest weekend of my life. This does not happen in real life, this only happens in movies. My cousin Amy lost her husband and both parents. She has three little kids to raise on her own. My other cousin Bryan, lost his parents and his long time girlfriend. He was heading up later in the day while my cousin Amy was going on a girls vacation which is why she did not go up with her husband.

As each day goes by, it becomes more real. Everyone has been gathered at Amy's house. She told the two older kids who are 5 and 7, I don't think they really understand. The 12 month old has no clue. Amy is such a rock. It is amazing how strong she is right now. This family was so close and for this to happen is so devastating. As I look around the room, I just see blank faces. Everyone is affected. I have not been able to really grieve yet. I keep on trying to ignore it, hoping that I will wake up and it will all be a dream. Can not believe this happened.

Pregnancy Brain Fart #7,777

The other day we were out of milk, eggs and yogurt. On my lunch I ran over to a close by grocery store to pick up these necessities and brought them back to my office's break room refrigerator to keep until I got off.

Of course I left that evening and forgot them. So the next morning I packed some Corn Chex in a plastic bag and them to work for my breakfast because my milk was there waiting for me. Once I poured the milk into the bowl I realized how thick it looked. I typically do all my shopping at Safeway and always buy their non fat milk. When I was at the other grocery store I could not find non fat milk and picked up instead a gallon of Vitamin D milk thinking it was the same. Little did I know that Vitamin D milk is WHOLE MILK! Who drinks Whole Milk?

So there I am with a gallon of freaking whole milk which I ended up donating to my coworkers for their coffee. No Whole Milk for me. No suree. Yuck. I might as well use Whipping Cream.

Just one example of my Pregnancy Brain.

Priceless

Ultra Cute Purple Flowy Top from Target to hide burgeoning belly: $20

Belly Band to Hold Up No Way in Hell are they buttoning/zippering Trouser Jeans: $18

Turquoise Heels: $40

Fabulous Hair Cut: Let's not say

Walking through a crowded room full of co-workers thinking you are looking super chic with baby bump but are soon told that your fly is down: PRICELESS

Stupid Belly Band!!!!! Sucks ASS!!!!!

Monday Mouth Off

What is up with pregnancy dreams? I have been having the most outlandish ones ever. They started very early on. They have been so numerous that I have forgotten most of them. A week or so ago, after I got back from New York, I had a dream I was in NYC with some strange guy at a bar drinking several cocktails. I was on about my 4th drink when I remembered I was pregnant! Then I started to say that the drinks were not that strong and that it would not be that bad. Let me just say I woke up from that one in a nervous sweat.

I have now had two gender dreams but they are conflicting. I have heard about people who dreamt they were having a boy for a long time and ended up having a girl and vice versa. Then I have heard of people dreaming about a boy or a girl and they ended up having the same! I guess it is a 50/50 chance, huh?

How come people (family members) feel they know what I am having? It always mind boggling to me. I guess that is the name of the pregnancy game.

Did you all have intuition about what you were having, gender dreams, etc? I love hearing about those kind of things.

You Know It's Hot When....

....when your dog is panting at 8 at night like she ran three miles but all she was doing was just laying down

.... when you cat is about to start panting herself

.... you are putting on your makeup in the morning and it slides off because of the sweat beading up on your face

....when you don't believe your car thermometer when it says 104 degrees but think it must be closer to 110

....when it is not any cooler inside or out of the house

....you don't mind standing in a cold shower

....nothing sounds good to eat except any kind of ice cream or popscicle

....you choose to never leave the office all day to avoid any split second you might be in the heat

....when the weather man says it will start being cool by being in the 90's

....the only thing that sounds good to wear is nothing at all, a big statement coming from a pregnant lady

....when going across the street to the mail box sounds like a marathon

Random Musings of a Pregnant Lady

1) It took me almost a week to ponder what my next blog might entail

2) I held my breath at the ATM the other day because some yahoo wearing wranglers and semi greasy hair was puffing on a cigarette next to me. Doesn't he know I am I am preggers? Who still smokes nowadays?

3) I am starting to get tired again, I thought I was over that a month ago.

4) What is up with people thinking they know if our baby will be a boy or a girl? Like they should know.

5) I am absolutely horrified at the ridiculous lack of cute maternity clothes out there. GAP, are you serious with your lack of sizes? Old Navy, since when did pants that look like you are carrying around a crap in your pants ever look cute? Target, you are actually working in the top/dress front, but where the heck are your pants? I need maternity pants! Badly! Tired of wearing jeans everyday with my Bella Band. It was 98 degrees today, not getting through the summer in pure denim. If I wanted that I would of moved to Iowa to drive my John Deere around. Don't worry I can joke about Iowa, my family is from there. Hence the reason for my love of meat and potatoes.

6) Where did these pigeons come from who congregate on our street's rooftops and crap all over the roofs?

7) Why are there no Dunkin Donuts in California?

8) Is Taco Bell really that bad for me? In particular, two hard tacos and one soft taco?

9) Must....find....cute....summer....purse

10) Some people at work are starting to eye me suspiciously as I begin to wear loose tops and refusal to move cases of wine.

Phew

Back from my trip. Got in late last night. Pooped and ready for bed time. The event was great, however, like any event there are always some glitches. I did get some good pictures in so that is good. I also made the entire plane trip back without feeling nautious. The flight there was a different story.

Inside the tent

The reception area overlooking the Hudson River

Looking down 9th Ave

More prettiness

Someone get me a stiff Shirley Temple! My heels are already off, flats are on and my pillow case dress was clutch. P.S., proud of my white legs.

The Big Apple

Back in New York for two nights. Got in yesterday evening. Super tired. Almost barfed on the plane as we were landing. I guess that is why pregnant women don't travel. Went to dinner last night with a friend in med school at NYU at Smith & Wollensky. New York knows how to make a good steak. The event I have been laboring over the past several months will be tomorrow and we will fly out afterwards getting in very late. To top things off, my hotel room is the smallest in hotel history. It is a super swanky hotel, however, the rooms are the size of closets. I have been in many New York hotel rooms, which are always typically smaller than the usual, however, these take the cake. I keep on bonking my head, running into the wall and trying very hard to figure out how I am to stuff 50 goody bags in these very close quarters. Guess I will need to squeeze in some shopping to make me think better.